Fear is a characteristic that is learned. We' re not born with it. When we're young we don't know fear. Everything is new to us. We want to explore, we want to find out how things work, and that's the beauty of being a child. Then at some point our parents plant the seed of fear in our heads. Now its not their fault, if they didn't we probably wouldn't live to the age of 5, but that seed stays with us forever. Now we learn that jumping off the couch can result in a broken arm, or pulling spike the family pitbulls tail could possibly make him bite our little arms off.
As we grow a little older we no longer need our parents to help instill fear in us. Society does the rest. We re taught through friends, television, and the media what we should be afraid of. So we go through life making new fears on a daily basis. Fear of failure, fear of not being accepted, fear of the unknown, fear of different races, fear of being alone, fear of change, these are just a few of the thousands of different fears that are prevalent in the world that we live in.
What a lot of us don't understand is fear can be a great tool for us. Fear can help motivate us to get that paper done in time, to work extra hours in the batting cage so we can make the high school baseball team, to go to work early and leave late so we can get a project done. Fear is what made me work so hard at getting better in basketball. I was scared that I would never be able to go to college if I didn't get a scholarship. I knew my mom didn't have enough money to pay for it, so every day and every night I trained that was one of the motivating forces in my workout.
"To conquer fear you have to look it in the eye from time to time"
Ask yourself what would you do if you were not afraid? How would your life be different? Would you of taken more chances? Would you of actually tried to talk to that girl or guy you had a crush on in high school? Would it of been you that took the game winning shot?
Use fear to your advantage. Don't let it stop you from going after you want in life. Fear can be hehelpful if you allow it to.
Never question whether or not you can overcome your fears, question why you haven't already..
Saturday, September 25, 2010
FEAR
Fear is a characteristic that is learned. We' re not born with it. When we're young we don't know fear. Everything is new to us. We want to explore, we want to find out how things work, and that's the beauty of being a child. Then at some point our parents plant the seed of fear in our heads. Now its not their fault, if they didn't we probably wouldn't live to the age of 5, but that seed stays with us forever. Now we learn that jumping off the couch can result in a broken arm, or pulling spike the family pitbulls tail could possibly make him bite our little arms off.
As we grow a little older we no longer need our parents to help instill fear in us. Society does the rest. We re taught through friends, television, and the media what we should be afraid of. So we go through life making new fears on a daily basis. Fear of failure, fear of not being accepted, fear of the unknown, fear of different races, fear of being alone, fear of change, these are just a few of the thousands of different fears that are prevalent in the world that we live in.
What a lot of us don't understand is fear can be a great tool for us. Fear can help motivate us to get that paper done in time, to work extra hours in the batting cage so we can make the high school baseball team, to go to work early and leave late so we can get a project done. Fear is what made me work so hard at getting better in basketball. I was scared that I would never be able to go to college if I didn't get a scholarship. I knew my mom didn't have enough money to pay for it, so every day and every night I trained that was one of the motivating forces in my workout.
"To conquer fear you have to look it in the eye from time to time"
Ask yourself what would you do if you were not afraid? How would your life be different? Would you of taken more chances? Would you of actually tried to talk to that girl or guy you had a crush on in high school? Would it of been you that took the game winning shot?
Use fear to your advantage. Don't let it stop you from going after you want in life. Fear can be hehelpful if you allow it to.
Never question whether or not you can overcome your fears, question why you haven't already..
As we grow a little older we no longer need our parents to help instill fear in us. Society does the rest. We re taught through friends, television, and the media what we should be afraid of. So we go through life making new fears on a daily basis. Fear of failure, fear of not being accepted, fear of the unknown, fear of different races, fear of being alone, fear of change, these are just a few of the thousands of different fears that are prevalent in the world that we live in.
What a lot of us don't understand is fear can be a great tool for us. Fear can help motivate us to get that paper done in time, to work extra hours in the batting cage so we can make the high school baseball team, to go to work early and leave late so we can get a project done. Fear is what made me work so hard at getting better in basketball. I was scared that I would never be able to go to college if I didn't get a scholarship. I knew my mom didn't have enough money to pay for it, so every day and every night I trained that was one of the motivating forces in my workout.
"To conquer fear you have to look it in the eye from time to time"
Ask yourself what would you do if you were not afraid? How would your life be different? Would you of taken more chances? Would you of actually tried to talk to that girl or guy you had a crush on in high school? Would it of been you that took the game winning shot?
Use fear to your advantage. Don't let it stop you from going after you want in life. Fear can be hehelpful if you allow it to.
Never question whether or not you can overcome your fears, question why you haven't already..
Saturday, September 18, 2010
WHY ME VS WHAT NOW?
Why me? Is this the question that you ask yourself when things are going wrong in your life? Do you feel like theres a dark cloud following you wherever you go? If "why me" is the first question you ask yourself when things go bad then you re going about it the wrong way. We all go through hard times at some point in our lives, its inevitable. But how you deal with those tough times are completely up to you, and that starts with changing what you say to yourself when bad things do happen.
What now? In these two words are a very powerful message that you're sending to yourself. In those two words you're already telling yourself that you are ready to move on and figure out your next step. You're also accepting the fact that what has happened is already in the past. Sometimes we waste time feeling sorry for ourselves or the hand we were dealt in life, instead of trying to figure out a plan to get through whatever difficult situation arises.
"Stop saying why me? Start saying what now? Adversity is what shapes our lives and separates the weak from the strong!"
A strong individual is always asking what now? They don't sit around saying why me? They don't focus on all the wrong things that have happened in their lives. Instead they're thinking whats the next step? Where do I go from here?
Being a coach I always tell my players to focus on the what now and not the why me. That's one of the reasons that I chose this topic. Basketball is such a fast moving game, if one of my players concentrated on a bad play that happened during the game it would most likely affect the next 5 or 6 plays before they had a chance to change their mindset and move on. Which of course would result in my blood pressure sky rocketing and ultimately the player coming out of the game.
I tell my players to adopt the same mindset in their everyday lives. I try to let them see the similarities between basketball and life. Both move fast, both make you have to make adjustments, and both can be equally rewarding and heartbreaking at any given time. But its how you deal with that heartbreak that makes you successful or not.
So when we do fall upon hard times ask yourself the right question. Plan a way to make it better, and move on.
What now? In these two words are a very powerful message that you're sending to yourself. In those two words you're already telling yourself that you are ready to move on and figure out your next step. You're also accepting the fact that what has happened is already in the past. Sometimes we waste time feeling sorry for ourselves or the hand we were dealt in life, instead of trying to figure out a plan to get through whatever difficult situation arises.
"Stop saying why me? Start saying what now? Adversity is what shapes our lives and separates the weak from the strong!"
A strong individual is always asking what now? They don't sit around saying why me? They don't focus on all the wrong things that have happened in their lives. Instead they're thinking whats the next step? Where do I go from here?
Being a coach I always tell my players to focus on the what now and not the why me. That's one of the reasons that I chose this topic. Basketball is such a fast moving game, if one of my players concentrated on a bad play that happened during the game it would most likely affect the next 5 or 6 plays before they had a chance to change their mindset and move on. Which of course would result in my blood pressure sky rocketing and ultimately the player coming out of the game.
I tell my players to adopt the same mindset in their everyday lives. I try to let them see the similarities between basketball and life. Both move fast, both make you have to make adjustments, and both can be equally rewarding and heartbreaking at any given time. But its how you deal with that heartbreak that makes you successful or not.
So when we do fall upon hard times ask yourself the right question. Plan a way to make it better, and move on.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
THE 1ST STEP
Out of all the steps that we take in our lives, the first one is usually the most difficult. Every new journey that we embark on can't start without that initial step, so what happens if we never take it? How many times have you said to yourself "If I could only start this routine I know I could keep it going", or "I would love to have this job but is still haven't sent my resume in yet". They're a million different scenarios we could probably think of where if we could only take that first step, we could accomplish a goal or task that we' ve been wanting to do.
Then why don't we? Is it laziness, fear, lack of self confidence, maybe all of the above? Which one of these reasons relate to you? And a better question is, why do you allow these negative feelings to stop you from taking that first step? I use the analogy of that first step being like jumping out of an airplane. Once you step out theres no going back, its done you re on your way. Now obviously if we take a step towards something we usually can go back, but the same courage that it takes to jump out of that airplane, is the same courage needed for that initial step.
"Climb that first stair before you worry about the other ones, if you don't climb the first one, the journey will never begin."
If you want something you have to go after it, and you have to go after it with everything you have. You can't be afraid to fail, you cant be afraid of the consequences, you have to take that first step and be willing to go wherever the journey takes you. If its not meant to be, then go to another staircase and start another journey somewhere else. Sounds simple right? Well it is! It's as simple as changing your mindset, and that starts with a thought. It starts with you thinking, "I know I can do this", If I need to get my resume in before a certain deadline, then I ll get up and do it weeks before", If I need to stop smoking to live a healthier lifestyle then yesterday was the last day of me smoking!"
You can't enjoy the rewards of the journey if you never start it. Micheal Jordan (whose arguably the greatest basketball player to ever played the game) once said "I rather go 0 for 20 (which meant not make a shot during a game) than go 0 for 0." (which is not shooting at all) Because at least he attempted to score when he went 0 for 20, he took that step, he didn't play it safe, he put himself out there and at the end of the day he could live with that.
They're many staircases that we will face in our lives, some might lead us to great things, and some might not, but to find out which one is which you're going to have to take that first step.
Then why don't we? Is it laziness, fear, lack of self confidence, maybe all of the above? Which one of these reasons relate to you? And a better question is, why do you allow these negative feelings to stop you from taking that first step? I use the analogy of that first step being like jumping out of an airplane. Once you step out theres no going back, its done you re on your way. Now obviously if we take a step towards something we usually can go back, but the same courage that it takes to jump out of that airplane, is the same courage needed for that initial step.
"Climb that first stair before you worry about the other ones, if you don't climb the first one, the journey will never begin."
If you want something you have to go after it, and you have to go after it with everything you have. You can't be afraid to fail, you cant be afraid of the consequences, you have to take that first step and be willing to go wherever the journey takes you. If its not meant to be, then go to another staircase and start another journey somewhere else. Sounds simple right? Well it is! It's as simple as changing your mindset, and that starts with a thought. It starts with you thinking, "I know I can do this", If I need to get my resume in before a certain deadline, then I ll get up and do it weeks before", If I need to stop smoking to live a healthier lifestyle then yesterday was the last day of me smoking!"
You can't enjoy the rewards of the journey if you never start it. Micheal Jordan (whose arguably the greatest basketball player to ever played the game) once said "I rather go 0 for 20 (which meant not make a shot during a game) than go 0 for 0." (which is not shooting at all) Because at least he attempted to score when he went 0 for 20, he took that step, he didn't play it safe, he put himself out there and at the end of the day he could live with that.
They're many staircases that we will face in our lives, some might lead us to great things, and some might not, but to find out which one is which you're going to have to take that first step.
Saturday, September 4, 2010
BEING THANKFUL
Once a year we all go through the same tradition. We meet with family and friends, eat a lot of food, and express how thankful we are for the things in our lives. Now if you ve been doing this tradition for a while, more and more it just becomes "I cant wait to eat Aunt Milly's chocolate cake", or "I cant believe I have to sit here while Uncle Jeff gets drunk again and talks about the war". The 30 second prayer giving thanks before dinner is exactly what it is, 15 or so words appreciating what we have and then its over.
Why do we only designate one day out of the 365 that we have each year being thankful for something? To me being thankful is just waking up in the morning. No matter what you have in store for you the rest of that day, the fact of the matter is that you did something over a hundred thousand people didn't do that day.
You Woke Up!
But that's not enough. Not for most of us. Well how about the ones that woke up with a roof over their heads? Now you ve done something that over 3 million other people didn't do that same morning.
And the list can go on and on. So why aren't we thankful for what we have? Why don't we show gratitude for the situations that we re in? Because in this day in age, we re taught that what we have is never enough. It's a beat thy neighbor society. I have a car, but Chuck next door has a better car, so even though I'm perfectly happy with what I have right now, I think I need to get something better that might be more expensive and later on stress me out just so I can "compete" with Chuck.
Being Thankful is saying "The fact that I have a car is awesome". It takes me from point A to point B and that's good enough for right now.
But It's not just materialistic things. How about the people in our lives? Were you raised by both parents? Were you raised by any? I grew up in a single family household. I ve always understood that what I had was special. I knew the way my mom cared and loved me and my siblings didn't happen with some families. So I never looked at not having a father growing up as a crutch. I knew that my situation was a lot better than people I knew with both parents, and I was always thankful for that. You hear people say, "well i don't talk to my mom or dad anymore" or "me and my brother or sister don't talk". When I hear these things being said I think of a quote I really like.
"Cherish what you have everyday because you cant once its gone".
Be thankful for the people you have in your life.
Be thankful for the little things and the big ones.
Don't wake up in the morning dreading the day, because your worst day would be someone else's best.
Spending everyday appreciating what you have, is a lot better than spending 30 seconds once a year waiting for the prayer to be over so you can eat.
Why do we only designate one day out of the 365 that we have each year being thankful for something? To me being thankful is just waking up in the morning. No matter what you have in store for you the rest of that day, the fact of the matter is that you did something over a hundred thousand people didn't do that day.
You Woke Up!
But that's not enough. Not for most of us. Well how about the ones that woke up with a roof over their heads? Now you ve done something that over 3 million other people didn't do that same morning.
And the list can go on and on. So why aren't we thankful for what we have? Why don't we show gratitude for the situations that we re in? Because in this day in age, we re taught that what we have is never enough. It's a beat thy neighbor society. I have a car, but Chuck next door has a better car, so even though I'm perfectly happy with what I have right now, I think I need to get something better that might be more expensive and later on stress me out just so I can "compete" with Chuck.
Being Thankful is saying "The fact that I have a car is awesome". It takes me from point A to point B and that's good enough for right now.
But It's not just materialistic things. How about the people in our lives? Were you raised by both parents? Were you raised by any? I grew up in a single family household. I ve always understood that what I had was special. I knew the way my mom cared and loved me and my siblings didn't happen with some families. So I never looked at not having a father growing up as a crutch. I knew that my situation was a lot better than people I knew with both parents, and I was always thankful for that. You hear people say, "well i don't talk to my mom or dad anymore" or "me and my brother or sister don't talk". When I hear these things being said I think of a quote I really like.
"Cherish what you have everyday because you cant once its gone".
Be thankful for the people you have in your life.
Be thankful for the little things and the big ones.
Don't wake up in the morning dreading the day, because your worst day would be someone else's best.
Spending everyday appreciating what you have, is a lot better than spending 30 seconds once a year waiting for the prayer to be over so you can eat.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)